As a four year old every afternoon I would wear my mother’s red lipstick (or rather slather it on my lips from East to West across my face) and look into the mirror on the dressing table like I was the most beautiful girl in the whole world.
I would then put on the stereo and dance to the latest 90’s Bollywood hits. My favourite one being Ankhiya Milaoo Kabhi Ankhiya Churaoo from the movie Raja. The epitome of grace, Madhuri Dixit has always been a favourite of mine. At that age I was half baked and pea-brained. All I knew was to Eat.Sleep.Play.Repeat.
When I started going to school my little brain began developing. My education continued in full swing and I started evolving into a wiser person. My mind was unlatched to grasp newer ideas and facts. The little Madhuri Dixit fan now aimed to be an air-hostess because I wanted to travel on a plane and visit other places in the world.
Like any other young school girl my career plans changed with every passing day. Sometimes I wished to be a teacher and sometimes a model or an actress. I was never serious about my hopes and aspirations because I was always preoccupied with watching bucketful of melodramatic Hindi shows and movies. Desi much? Yup. I have been “too Indian” as a kid. A matching dupatta to go with my dress and colourful bangles were as important as oxygen to me. When I look at my older pictures I bury my face in shame. I was the biggest fashion disaster ever! And yeah,not to forget I had no teeth as well.
Anyway, I was growing up and every year my priorities would change..still immature but developing so as to say. A settled future, financial stability,health and success were all words of little or no importance back then. Till I cleared my high school I was under the impression that the only meaning of life is to study.
Later when I joined college I was in the course of turning into a mature and a more sagacious woman. I drew a comparison between what I ultimately wanted and what were just mere desires of a young,inane mind of mine. I was now completely sure of what I wanted to BE and what I wanted to HAVE. People and their narrow mindedness did not affect me any further. By the end of college it dawned upon me that I am here to create a niche for myself on my own terms. I belong to no one and I am the supreme authority of my own life. I also learned to handle my relations well and become a socially responsible person. My character underwent a magnanimous change for the better. I developed a fine taste for food, fashion and travel. To cut a long story short, I Metamorphosed and I established my own motto ‘Love.Hope.Dream.’

Forever and ever,
Samreen Ahmed


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